A/N: So a few days back for writing 101 we were asked to put a poll in one of our posts or set up a contact form so our readers could give us inspiration on what to write. I embedded a poll with a few options and got two votes both for different options so I’ve decided to combine them- hopefully what you are about to read is a Satirical Romantic Comedy.
John was a bumbling fool and Jill always made sure to let him know.
“Sheesh John, could you be any more of a klutz?” He was a butterfingers, frequently dropping items.
“S-sorry Jill, I’ll pick it up right away.”
He was a stumbling, mumbling idiot who was completely unaware of his surroundings. And so it was that he found himself in an emotionally abusive relationship with Jill.
“Ugh, thank you John for all your help.” Her words would drip with sarcasm and yet John would smile and reply that she was welcome.
“He irks me sooo much,”
“Well Jill maybe you should be flat out honest with him? He doesn’t seem to get your general brand of sarcasm.”
“Fine. But if this backfires I’m never forgiving you Rosie.” Jill was best friends with another of the office workers, Rosie, who enjoyed generally making life harder for everyone. Rosie particularly enjoyed setting traps for people and causing problems.
John the silly fool was unaware of Rosie’s tricky nature.
“You know how to tell a girl likes you johnny boy?”
“Uh no miss Rose,” he responded as he tried to retrieve his pencil from under the vending machine.
“You can tell a girl likes you when she’s honest with you, when she really expresses her anger. In fact I bet someone in this office is really keen on you,”
“Who?! Ow.” John had jarred his arm as he tried to get up while it was still under the vending machine.
“Oh I’m sure you’ll know when she tries to confess.” Rosie chortled as she strolled away from the fool.
“Oh miss Jill,”
“You are a complete and utter fool, an absolute idiot, incapable of doing anything and I-”
“Please stop miss Jill, you needn’t go on I know what you want to say.”
“Oh miss Jill I am honoured that you would have such interest in me, of course I’ll go out with you.”
“I’ll take you out for dinner after work, will that be okay?”
“Okay, I look forward to it!” And with that John returned to his work and Jill aghast was unsure of what to do.
“Bwahhahahah” Rosie cracked up as soon as Jill told her what had happened.
“You bitch, you put him up to this, didn’t you?”
“Well I didn’t think he’d organise a date.”
“Hmm you know maybe I’ll go,”
“Yeah I think I will.”
John was a fool, and Jill never let him forget it. Especially not on their anniversaries.
A/N: Maybe not as Satirical as it could have been but I hope everyone enjoyed it.